Tried super hard…to keep to my words..that I would be here….no matter what. Dying to keep to my words Was an exciting 3 days…when I suddenly have to take on certain responsiblity. It was exciting, fun and stressful of course…a pity that the thing did not work out today still….only at night then it was resolved. Kinda feel abit failure at supporting this… ai….this feeling is kind of crappy and sucky although everyone is telling me it is not my fault.

Could it have been better tested and prepared? I certaintly think so…no access no briefing no documentation was no excuse! Hai….crappy feeling and I need to get over it! Jia you jia you jia you!

Lastly…may god bless my brother, myself and my sis … to overcome our illness and nothing serious is happening. I am so worried…….for him~~~

Then at work, I realise that is totally wrong We have to follow up on this and that why they are not connected etc. At first I was pretty unsure of what to do, but slowly i get the hang of it and due to the limited time things get pretty exciting. Most funny thing is when i heard my name over the conference bridge…haha..someone who dunno me just repeated … a gal by the name sxxxx called and says …… ^^| gosh….haha…somemore that was after a different instruction was given over the bridge so my instruction was off….^^|  Some more HL can still joke with me says I became “famous”!!!

But I felt pretty good, felt that given that i have not much briefing before hand and everything was learnt / told / known on the spot, i can still manage it towards the end. Updating the list, calling etc … felt so much happier and better as compared to the previous round (one of the rehersal) and this actual exercise was much more exciting. Although in the end I still did a stupid mistake….mistaking my own windows “start” button as the remote desktop one and open a wrong sql window~~ then kenna minus points again! Somehow i am very prone to this kind of silly mistake…and kept kenna demerit points ^^| until my other “sis” actually says ” how many points you want to minus?” ……

Recently i also realised something…I been lunching with the leads and boss….in my team. Someone forgot something in the office and i say left other “sis”, MS and HL in the office…then he kinda don’t want to trouble them to take. To me…..anytime i sure ask other “sis” to help me ^^| Mmmm….to me, before other “sis” was a lead, before I am in the team, I already take her as a good fren/sis/someone to learn from and also lunch with her, MS and HL also. Didn’t really want to change anything just because now I am in the team. Have i take our work relationship too casually? i wonder…mm….but I don’t want to add in any distance just because we are in the same unit >.<

this aside, still dunno what I did wrong..that I kinda fall out of the circle for the clique (LD/LDLD) i like to hang out with at work…….i really wonder, been trying really hard to get back in but sometimes is just a bit too tiring. there are only so much i can do … maybe i just think too much, just myself is drifting away…i really dunno though. Sometimes it gets abit tough when friendship does not reciprociate i guess.

But after trying so hard, I also realised that i seems to overlooked my other friends outside of work…thus recently been trying hard to catch up with them. Also … being to feel that my parents seems to need/want some times, more time than before^^|.. then also should give some time for my siblings … then church etc…oh time is so limited!

I am amaze also that today i can still work today after all the “fang zong” – ness i have last night. but it was a good chill out time, pouring out xin li hua and stuff. but i guess the drink was indeed a little too strong for me ^^|….maybe…thats the real me? hahahha…..i really wonder…this part of me seems to appear once every 1-2 years.

Lastly…said something wrong recently…ai…think i really want to learn … to be more quiet…talk less!!! Sometimes..silence is golden!

Hope my work is just like my study, it just get better and better each year   Really think the decision to join a big company (although this is not MNC) to experience what it is to work in a > 50 people company is right! I realised i used to think that one month to earn $3-4k is alot….now I think many of my colleagues earn more than that (not me ^^| ). I used to think that to get 2 month bonus is very good already yet here I think many of my colleagues gets more than that including myself THus I am very happy with the bonus also! wahhahahahaha

Although i know it is not high to some, maybe in future i will have higher expectation, but now at this moment, i am so happy

To reward myself, I shall……save the  $$$. Been indulging myself in alot of things with my monthly salary so for this bonus, other than bringing my mum to TW and give abit more to my parents (haven’t think of how much ^^|), save for next year income tax….the rest I shall save some and invest some!

One thing i hope…i hope i do not become an ATM again because of the bonus and it brings only joy and will not trigger off some unwanted event. I been trying hard to forgive and forget and built our relationship, please do not ruin it…do not just because you know i got bonus …The trust is still not there but at least now I am willing to spend time with you, a saturday afternoon to fly kite with you. It takes time to regain trust after being hurt…I am trying hard, let this be a test and god bless…please bless him to pass it!

That day when I was lunching with my colleagues, I happened to talk about the random job i worked when I was studying. Then M commented that i seems to have a hard life, but actually I am the most fortunate one in my family. Although i was almost aborted, have to do alot of part time…but with my background i get to travel so much, and have what I have today, I am very happy and feel very fortunate already!. I didn’t felt that the working is a hardship, i have grown up and learn from these experiences…i think it is what makes up me today. Because I earned a mere $3.50/hr before, because I did menial job before, I do not look down on people working on menial job, respected it and I strive to have higher achivement in studies, to earn more $$ and i must bring a better standard of living to my family Maybe…abit that i am wondering is…if i have study harder from young…or from uni year 1…would i be able to get first class? hahaha….but then again, to study so hard is so not my style

Next…want to talk about saturday where I went out with my Mum and sis. Was a fun day where we went to eat watami (don’t have my favourite daifuku~~). Wanted to use my $5 watami voucher so decided to go and eat at watami since we enjoyed the food. This time round we order all the right stuff but guess what? I forgot to use the voucher! aiyo..baka! Luckily i paid by visa, can void and repay again^^| lucky!

Next lucky thing? Last week I bought a wilson K factor tennis racket and only upon payment then I know that it comes with a free wilson backpack but was out of stock. it is value for $$ even without the bag so I decided to go ahead and buy, least expected…the bag is still available ^^ So in the end => it is super value for $$ ^_____________________________^ thank god!!!

So many happy things in a week, hahaha. Then we went to watch salt with the complementary voucher given by my financial planner. Nice movie Really wonder if angelina jolie knows martial art in real life? THen after that we saw an archery centre and went in to have some fun. 72 arrows for 3 pax for a total of $24! It is my sis and mum’s first experience with archery, hahah so fun!

Then we have supper and “nua” at the sofa, playing with it … then go home. but guess what? we missed the last bus (to be exact we didn’t noticed that there were bus diversion until we waited for 30mins and kenna midnight charge…>.<) and in the end gotta pay extra $$ to take cab home. It was a small matter but i kinda lost my temper (didnt say any awful things but the way i contain it is being quiet…which i guess being my mum and sis they can of cause felt the fiery aura >.< aiya…dunno whats wrong with me…to be unhappy abt such small thing. Hope  i did not ruin the day~~). Overall it is a happy day … hahah. Damage on pocket -> $54 for watami + $24 for archery => $78. yeah it is < $100 with sis treated us for the supper. Must control my temper better…although with improvement (keeping quiet)…but still not good enough as people can still sense the awful aura…must gambatte!

Then last night was a happy night also, spend some time catching up with my overseas friend. Didn’t realised…its been almost half a year since we last catch up. Almost work until no friends^^|||. Our gathering last dec felt like its just yesterday ^^| 好想念大家阿   我又要去TW 嘍﹐ 大家見面+吃飯吧 讓ET 媽媽看看這十年來在國外好好照顧ET的人 有人要和我們一起玩也很歡迎!!!

A long blog…been kepting all these thoughts with me

Still have one more part to blog…I finally did some programming in 1 year plus!  And this round, i coded perl !!! wahhhaa… its been a while since i am so focused…i do get focused at work but the level is never the same as when i am coding. I was so focused that i forgot to go toilet and felt a bit of strain on my forehead / head after 2 hours plus of super focused coding! hahah..so happy i can improve the mining script!

This may really be the final place where  i will settle down…hahah. Although i  see my other “sis” working hard even during weekend and public holiday. Ai…too bad i can’t be of much help! Nvm…i will try my best to learn and be a little more useful!

Althoughh a bit disappointed with myself that the stats amended so many times =.= eyeball is really very subjected to human error, must enhance the data mining! but initial proposal was not successful….my senior says he see no need to improve to that detail level…maybe i have approached the thing wrongly, actually the stats wasn’t wrong is just that it was mined for the initial requirement which was changed towards the end…in my opinion he is another very zai people but i guess the way i approach it is wrong thus making him a bit defensive. Mmm…. i dun have that meaning at all…i just want to improve the work…so that in future the team no need to spend so much time looking at the log each time something happened. Nevermind, written down some example and logic, tomorrow shall try again

Must atone for my mistakes in the mining hahha … this is also a perfect chance to learn perl, the mining is just nice to learn perl, not too complex not that simple. Hope I can get to write the enhancment!

Last night did not sleep well as brain was too active cant get to sleep. Today was actually a bit tired but a colleague still commented why i look so happy …. LOLOL…am i really that obvious and easy to read? ^^| hahaha

Then tonight J asked me if i can put down why i am so happy? i wondered…actually apart from finding the work interesting, am really happy that i can be of some help. KPI for myself is to help to reduce my team member work Really happy that they trust me to use the production sys ytd to generate some info with the DB! almost 2 years never code already….not even sure if i can remember the query….loll

Really missed touching the codes! finally can code something! seeing the people around me can type DCL so easily…really admire, hope someday i can also type DCL just off my finger tip.

 Been thinking about if i should settle down here… but 1 year ago…i chose to try new things also  because i find it abit static after coding web programming for 3 years temp work. mmmm not sure if i settle down here will I be sianz after 2-3 years. Also if the people change would I still enjoy it? i wonder…..

 Sleepy…sleep sleep.

Buying the TV is not an impulse thing since my mum been wanting to buy for weeks as her room TV is spoilt but the selection is quite an impulse thingy. i been trying to convince her to buy after I get my bonus! But since there is this electronics bazaar so no harm seeing Hahhaa…..used all my expenses $$ for the month + $200 on credit to buy this TV! how am I going to survive! whahhaa…is again dipping into my saving again. this is bad, i just kept using my saving despite i am working! but cant wait for the TV to be delivered to my house for use hahah… dunno if the TV is good or bad but at the spot both me and my friend felt that it is sharp and colour is nice

But because of this $799 burn in my pocket, my tennis racket plan shall delay till i get my bonus! >.<…provided the bonus can cover the $799…lolol.

Next shall blog about my first assignment at the new unit!

Yesterday went back for an exercise and this is considered the first assignment at the new unit since I have only been reading so far. However, things did not go smoothly. I just get to know that I can take taxi there so i decided to go to work by taxi but little did I expect that it took me half an hour to get a cab (even though i called forone after i couldnt get one for abt 10-15mins), then we got stuck in a traffic jam at bukit timah road~~~ In the end I reached my office at 2:05pm, when I came out at 12:55pm … and I am suppose to reach at 1.30~2pm.

Then because I was late, was abit panicky as I was upset that I missed the chance to observe the verification of the system and I thought soon it will be the time for the activity that I am supposed to perform. Was quite unfamiliar at setting up since it is my first time despite I practiced at test server before. So bad that I even replied ”I dunno how to do that!” when i was prompted to use telnet to check my connection. Indeed I am not familiar since I hardly use any command line before be it for windows/unix, but i shouldnt have answered in that tone and should not be so nervious…

Then subsequently when I was doing whatever I need to do, then i realised I used the wrong version of the s/w. My impression is that the older version is only for me to play around…never expect thats the one to use in prod system, especially when I did not have the older version in my system even when I am learning how to do the stuff I need to perform on sat. but I should have thought of it, the newer version is in testing, how can it be prod copy. Then after that there are some settings that I did and did not notice that the auto was changed to manual after I commit the changes the 2nd time =.=

All in all…i am quite disappointed with myself . Feeling abit down since ytd…but I shall pick myself up … Shall gam ba te in future. One very prominent weakness…command line, i am totally cui in this area =.= But this set back shall not deter my interest for the unit, I shall continue to learn and am still looking forward to work each day at here.

What a day though, was woken up by rain and thunder at 5plus am…then woke up at 8am just to stare at the rain ruining my tennis game. then the cui-ness at work. hai… gam ba te gam ba te gam ba te!!!

Current racket comes with a headsize of 110 sq inch, which is quite forgiving, currently looking at rackets with headsize of 100-105 sq inch. Been reading a bit online, fall in love with the wilson K factor! am aiming for a wilson K factor racket but here are a few that i am keen in, not sure which to get…lol:

Wilson K Factor KTour Team.FX

Wilson K Factor KTour Team.FX

As a lighter version of the popular KTour, the KTour Team.FX offers an extremely maneuverable and spin-friendly response. Though lighter weight, the KTour Team.FX maintains excellent stability with the FX technology. The Quad Shaft construction in the throat area of the racquet provides 23% more torsional stability and a more evenly distributed mass. With FX, you can have the lightweight maneuverability but retain some of the playing qualities of a heavier racquet. The 102 sq in headsize offers a generous sweetspot. Our TW testers found this to offer easy pop and comfortable feel even outside of the sweetspot. With its lightweight, topspin was easy to generate from all areas of the court. Superb maneuverability meant angles were easy to find when attacking the ball at midcourt. This lightweight KTour Team.FX is a great option for players looking for a more powerful, more forgiving version of the KTour. All in all, this comfortable ‘tweener racquet is a must try for players at the 3.5+ level or the advanced junior player.

Wilson K Factor KZen

Wilson K Factor KZen

This maneuverable racquet is an excellent choice for the intermediate level player looking for a control oriented racquet that’s more forgiving than an all out players stick. There’s some impressive stability to be had when blocking back hard struck shots or when pushing forward to knock off a volley. At net the racquets offers lots of control and a solid sense of depth and directional control. The 9.9 ounce weight and 310 swingweight (RDC) provides a perfect balance between mobility and stability, making this one a great choice for a variety of player styles at the 3.5+ level. Long fast swings result in some nice pace and easy access to spin. The open string pattern provides plenty of bite on the ball and the stiff frame response seems to further enhance the bite and action of spin shots. The open string pattern also provides a somewhat lively feel and good comfort at impact. More forgiving than an all out player’s stick, this one is the perfect choice for the player seeking some added mobility and pop without giving up control.

Wilson K Factor KBold

Light, maneuverable and offering plenty of power, the KBold brings lots of court performance at a great price. The 100square-inch headsize offers the perfect blend of power and control. There’s plenty of bite from the 16×20 stringbed for added spin and feel. At net the racquet feels mobile with a clean feel at contact. At just under 10 ounces strung, even smaller framed players will find it easy to generate fast swing speeds on serves and groundstrokes. All in all this racquet offer lots of performance for the 3.5 and above level player.

Base on the NTRP rating, I rate myself at 3.0 and all these racket are for 3.5 and above, hope I am not over ratting myself Select mainly due to the K factor technology and the headsize of 100-103 sq inch, medium power etc .

Must think think which one i prefer..haha

 wanna blog abt my work but too sleepy i guess i will leave it till tml!

Recently been “crossing stance” with S quite often since the first meeting. I must say i am really not good in this but after a year here I have learn to not accept certain things and maybe because there is a young one to “protect” so i am less weak and slightly firmer in certain stand.

But what i see today really disgust me, to think S ask me to continue to hold the fort … knowing I rotating away. Luckily someone came to my rescue hahah..thank you!

Though amazed and digusted, i think is a lesson learnt. Probably is a test to me in my life to stop being a Yes gal and say No and be firm at certain stand at time Testing if I have matured abit after a year ? ^^|

Enough of complain, lets talk about my new work Today finally started something more solid…learned how to verify the system and inject orders! hahah…is some operational stuff but at least saturday would be useful.

Still uncertain what I can achieve at the end of 6 months though…just try my best to learn as much and as fast as I can. Somehow I kept feeling that I am lagging behind, must chase back these 2 weeks of time.  Hope can have some solid foundation and contribution lah.

Enjoying the feeling of looking forward to work everyday! hahhahaa….so many people noticed that recently i look happier / more carefree. hahaha…i am just so easy to read!

As much as i hope they don’t need to OT, it is important for them to be involve in what they need to do also. Hope SP wont be traumatize by all the work, still have more to handover although we have cleared one the most time consuming part. but thats only like 20%…more to come man!

Considering QA work have been handed over to QA, I hope he can manage the rest…really have my empathy for being required to OT so early … hai!

For myself, alot more to learn and improve on guideing people. Realise sometimes i didn’t go into detail enough although I already felt what I gone through with him is already much more detailed as compared to when I first join the head office.

Still remember the first time I do monthly report, KPI dashboard, meeting minutes and etc. KPI dashboard and vendor meeting especially was just throw to me without much explaination or info…then comes the QA part lolol. How time flies!

Today MS and I have dinner/lunch together (dinner for her, lunch for me for the whole day I only had my first food of the day at abt 3pm which is birthday cake and then a super late lunch at ard 7pm!). Talked about guideing people and work attitude and having a life outside work…a good chat, can feel that she is also someone worth learning from

Back to work…so much to clear man!

So much to handover…aiyo, handing over is never a simple job. but everytime i think of the new things i learning / going to learn let me feel energetic! Gambatte!!!

Meeting my new boss 1 on 1 tml…formally meeting her on a 1 on 1 basis. wonder what will become my KPI!